Like, Scroll, Repeat
A lot of us find ourselves in the space of social media, more specifically Instagram. We spend our time liking, commenting, scrolling and sometimes we find ourselves stalking old friends or even complete strangers.
As someone who loves Instagram (if I’m honest part of me feels embarrassed to admit that but it’s true), I also find myself asking, what’s to much time on social media? What’s to much to share? and does it actually lead to authentic connections?
I’ve always been a person who has to withdraw to self-evaluate, and so the months of May and June I took a six week break from all social media. So what made me take a break or decide to come back for that matter?
Was it to post about my cute new nephew Major? maybe :)
Was it to like, scroll, and repeat? or Was it to glass over my own life? or Was it to come back to a community of moms?
I have decided to come back on social media because I missed the community of moms that I belonged too. Moms I have never met, however some of us have :). Over those six weeks I found myself telling my counselor that my anxiety hadn’t reduced after leaving social media, but instead I felt like I had removed myself from a community that I helped start. My counselor later helped me understand it was because most of my time on Instagram is spent creating dialogue and relationships with other moms. There is some like, scrolling, and repeating for me (I’ll be honest) but it was in that moment I realized that my counselor was right. It was a place for me to connect with other triplet moms and moms with differently abled kids. It has become a place for me to connect.
So here I am coming back and admitting that I like Instagram. I like sharing our story and our lives. I also love the new connections I make weekly in the disability world, triplet world, faith, mom, mirco-preemie, you-name-it world. To all those who called, texted, emailed, mailed letters, thanks for checking in on us. I love that the community I am a part of leaves Instagram to care for others. So where do I go from here?
Here are some “Instagram Guidelines” that I follow…
Instagram is not my counselor. It’s not a place for me to vent or share my raw feelings. I do not first filter any heartbreak, medical news, or joys through the lens of Instagram. I share after I have started to process, pray, and share in close community before I make it public. This protects me, my family, and you!
A question I task myself is…Will I feel this way a month from now?
A friend and I started sharing our social media weekly reports each week to help hold us accountable. I set what I believe to be a reasonable daily goal and she helps encourage me to stay accountable with my time. *I do think there is a misconception here. Some people think that if you post a lot then you are on Instagram a lot, those don’t go hand in hand. I am very present in my day to day and often find that my phone is dead (ask my friends) or I left my phone somewhere. Spending less time on Instagram came when I stopped mindlessly scrolling. We all use social media for different reasons. My friend uses hers for a photography business, you might use it to connect with old friends, or watching your favorite cooking videos? So we all use social media for different reasons.
Setting a daily time limit goal that is reasonable will come after you determine your purpose for using social media.
This is my space. One of my friends that I first met through Instagram, and who we have now traveled together and become real life besties, we have talked about how to handle sharing our lives and medical journies with our kids. And it’s as simple as this, this is my space to share. I don’t have to share everything or anything. I don’t have to answer the hurtful question or communicate with the people who just “don’t understand”. Even though I am a wide open person and love sharing, there are some things that aren’t appropriate to share or don’t have my kids best interest at heart. It’s not being rude to not answer or share.
This is your space. You get to choose what you share and when you share it.
On brand. I can’t with this. I’m laughing as I even write these words because it’s just not me. I’m never going to have professional photos, perfect edits, or amazing captions. The most I know about that stuff is I like the Nashville filter. My life is real. I am real and will stay authentic to me on this space. And let’s be real, I got triplets people, I ain’t got the time.
Find your authentic self and share. Don’t be someone you aren’t.
5. But on a serious note, in a world where we are saturated with social media, there is still good to be found. Please read these words and believe them, THERE IS GOOD TO BE FOUND. Thank you to my Instagram community for loving me, encouraging me, and teaching me what it means to advocate. Thank you for praying for us, sending us packages, and most importantly thank you for leaving social media to care for us.