36 Weeks: 86 Days of Life
Today, Abby’s parents, Laurie and Brad, now known as JamMa and JamPa, are sharing some thoughts. Whew! What a trip this has been! When we see the picture that Abby and Ryan have on this blog, we are not sure that they could have found a more appropriate picture that represents this journey. It reminds us of how small we are and just how big our GOD is! We are but two specks of dust on a piece of trash, but yet, He knows us and loves us.
As a parent, you hurt when your kids hurt. Then, as a grandparent, the hurt is greater, because you hurt for your grandchildren and then you hurt, even more, when you see pain in the eyes of your child. The medical team advised us of the rollercoaster journey that we were about to begin, but we were woefully unprepared for the number of extreme ups and downs, twists and turns, that persist on a regular basis. There have been times where we have been physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually exhausted. But, we could not be prouder of how Abby and Ryan have embraced this incredible journey.
We are grateful for the many thoughts and prayers, from around the globe, where thousands have lifted our family up in prayers. We can only say, thank you! Thank you a thousand times! Prayers do indeed matter. It is by the sheer grace of God that we are where we are today. It reminds us of the words from an old hymn, Just a little closer walk with Thee…I am weak, but He is strong… And that is what we have held in our hearts. We are closer to each other and most of all to God. A friend recently shared with us these words, “God is not compelled by our need. He is compelled by our desperation.” We cannot even begin to tell you how humbling this journey has been. We have cried, we have praised Him, we have been angry, we have fasted, we have sat in reverent silence and we have stood tall on our knees.
As a parent, you want to fix things. You want to help. This has been a time, where, sometimes, we can only wrap our arms around each other, share a tear, and offer comfort by something as simple as a reassuring embrace.
Abby and Ryan have been amazing. Their faith is strong, but it has been rocked. However, their faith is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness. As parents and grandparents, we want to be able to tell them that everything is going to be alright. But, those words would be shallow, because we just don’t know what the future holds. BUT, we do know WHO holds the future and that is what we grasp on to, as assuredly as the cross.
We have many more good days than bad now, but the setbacks keep reminding us that the end of the woods have been extended beyond what we had hoped. The doctors and nurses continue to amaze us. We have no words, but to simply say, “We are glad that God made people like you.” They have indeed been amazing and have shared in this journey by caring for and loving the mighty three as their own.
People often ask what they can do to help. The number one thing is to pray. We are firm believers in the power of prayer. We come from a long line of prayer warriors and Brad’s mom has led the way. At 87.8 years old, she is the only person we know who weighs her age. But, let me tell you this; she is one of the strongest people we know. When praying, she is a giant! Certainly not by stature, but when it comes to spiritual strength and steady words for comfort, she often says the exact right thing, at the exact right moment, without even knowing it.
We are blessed. We are indeed blessed beyond anything we deserve and we will praise God, regardless of the outcome.
As most of you know, we have five grandchildren under the age of two; triplets by Abby (our oldest daughter) and twins by Mary Beth (our middle daughter)! We are often asked, “Does this run in the family?” We usually respond, “It does now!” And then to think that our youngest daughter is married to a twin!! So who knows what lies ahead!! When we talk about our grandchildren, we talk in clusters… the trips, the twins….
Sometimes, words can capture an entire story in a line or two. Although there are many that come to mine, we keep coming back to this one: Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God to Thee.
Maggie
Maggie Gail, “Pearl,” has made steady improvements over the last couple of weeks. She has been moved to the step-down unit as of today and continues to be on bubble CPAP! She weighs in at a staggering 4 lbs. 15 oz. and is so close to joining the 5 lb. club. She also graduated to an open crib and the number of her apnea and brady episodes (where they stop breathing and the heart rates drops) has significantly decreased. Maggie, along with her brothers, began receiving her vaccinations. She is currently sharing a joining room with her brother Max! There are times when she appears to be smiling and it is so heartwarming to behold. Abby calls her the silly one! Her next eye exam is Friday and we hope she will NOT have to visit the big city.
Max
Mr. Max weighs 4 lbs. 13 oz. and has had a very good week. He continues to make steady progress, remains on high-flow oxygen support, and is also in an open crib. At one point, Max was lying on his stomach and was able to push up and raise his head. It was quite a sight to behold. The other day, Laurie (JamMa) got to hold Max for the very first time! Max smiled and JamMa cried. On Monday, Max had a cranial scan and the results showed that the blood was dissolving and at this time no shunt will be necessary! Max continues to be a fighter and is truly mighty!
Miller
Last week was a busy one for Mr. Miller. He got to visit the big city, Atlanta, on Tuesday, as he was transported to CHOA for the same eye procedure that Max had two weeks prior. Miller was strong and brave and tolerated the injections and was transported back to NE GA Medical Center the next morning. His follow-up eye exam, Monday, showed blood vessel regression, which means the procedure is having positive results. Miller was the first one to join the 5 lb. club and now weighs 5 lbs. 9 oz. He loves his food and may be ready for a cheeseburger soon! But, from previous experiences, we have learned that conditions can change quickly. Miller took a step back last night and began having extreme apnea episodes. He had to be moved back to ICU and placed on the NIV for respiratory support. However, he was much better late this afternoon and they think the apnea could have been a result of the eye exam, vaccines, the stress of the past few days and just being tired. We have learned that preemies have a small reserve and tire very easily. Miller continues to be our little “mover and shaker.”
Praises
Thankful for the nurses, doctors, respiratory therapists, and other NICU staff, who have been amazing and have become like family.
Thankful for friends and family who continue to support Abby and Ryan on this journey.
Thankful that each baby continues to make progress, despite each challenge and obstacle.
Thankful that God entrusted Maggie, Max, and Miller to parents like Abby and Ryan.
Prayer Requests
Ryan has returned to work. Pray for him as he will not be able to spend as much time with the mighty three.
With most of the family returning to teaching, pray that Abby will feel God’s peace and presence, like never before.
Pray that Maggie and Miller will not have any more apnea episodes.
Pray for improved lung and eye development and decreased oxygen support for all three.
Pray that all three will soon be in the step-down unit together!
Pray for wisdom and discernment for all the caregivers.
Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
-JamPa and JamMa
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